Welcome to the Jungle, baby!

So due to popular demand...Jason and Emily have decided that the rest of the world should be blessed to hear our thoughts on current issues of the day. We have much to say, and such limited means to get our message across...so we decided this world wide web phenomenon might be just what the doctor ordered.

So let's just get to the nitty gritty:

Issues of the Day #1: We really need to sell our house. We would pretty much say that we are desperate at this point. We have found a van that we would like to live in down by the river, but to make this important move, our townhouse must go. When we say van we really mean a rockin house that we found and when we say river we mean Orem!

Issue #2

What is with the scooter craze? This really makes little to no sense to me. Now I am all for saving money and being economical on gas, but does this really mean that we have to look retarded while riding around town? Not to mention I (Jason) just about jacked two of these scooter riders in downtown SLC today. Luckily, there were no casualties...unless you count one of the cookies that I brought home. Unfortunately it didn't make it.

Issue #3

The Stroller Mafia. Now if anybody out there is part of the stroller mafia (ie, moms walking and, or running with their little kids in their stroller for their morning workout), please advise Emily on the rules of this particular club. For example, can a non-card carrying member (aka non-parent) be a part of this organization? And if so, do they lend out little kids to mow down other people, or should she have a doll in a stroller? Either way, this looks like a morning workout she get behind.

We thought the cyclists were a scary bunch in the morning, not to mention the cross country runners...but neither hold a candle to the stroller mafia. By the way, are strollers in the baby section, athletic department, or automotive?

Issue #4

We were NOT kidding about issue #1. We really need to sell our house. Emily is not above dragging people out of their cars, to make them come see our place. This is why the stroller mafia seems like a good negotiating tactic. Of course when we thought this through, 5 year olds probably are not the target demographic to purchase our house. But conversely we believe 5 year olds will be our key demographic readers on our blog.

Issue #5

PBR and Demolition Derbys. Two of my (Jason's) all-time favorite live spectator sports are the PBR tour (Professional Bull Riders) and Demolition Derbys. I have yet to attend a Rodeo where a bull rider has not been seriously injured, and or taken to the hospital. Now I am not necessarily into violence, but I believe this is equivalent to the ancient day Gladiators. Control the masses, control Rome. That little tid bit is a free piece of advice. Speaking of bull riding, I am reminded of my friend Zack. He decided to enter the Lehi Bull Riding Rodeo back in '05. Now Zack had never ridden a bull and thought it best to get, some practice. So he had some sort of connection up in Idaho, where he could go and try it out. I guess that went fairly well. So fast forward to the day of the rodeo. He goes to the draw and the guy there tells him, and I quote "Oh...you drew Cody 218, son." Zack of course asked the gentleman who Cody 218 is. The man replied, "well, Cody 218 is gay." Now I am not sure how exactly a bull's personal life affects his bucking ability. But I do know that Zack got thrown off in about 2.1 seconds. He survived and to this day tells everyone he rode a bull for 2.7 seconds. And who didn't believe I could get a Tim McGraw reference in there?

As far as demo derbys? They are the chariot races of our day. Last year in Manti a dude tipped his car over and it started on fire with him in it. He got out alright (he was also on fire), but needless to say it was a spectacle not to be believed!

Question #1

Does anyone know how to start or manage a HOA (home owners association)? We have decided this is where the real money is. We used to think it was pyramid scams...boy were we off. If you really want to get rich quick by doing nothing, manage an HOA. They charge unholy sums of money for basically no benefits what so ever. Why am I paying $120/month for an opportunity to use a 10 foot lamo 4 foot deep pool. And a work out room that smells worse than any locker room I have ever stepped foot in. Not a big fan.